In my days as a museum guard, i noted that the larger the sign, the fewer people read it. i watched folks completely miss the signs describing an exhibit, and then crane their necks and squint to read some little manufacturer's tag in the corner of the side of a display case...
The funniest sign to me is “Authorized Personnel Only” or some variation on a door. Every door is for authorized personnel; the question is just, who is authorized? The door to McDonald’s is for authorized people only, and they’ve authorized everyone.
This is spooky. I just made a comic about Authorized Personnel. My motivation was a doctor who casually walked through a door that was painted “Authorized Personnel” in the biggest lettering I’ve ever seen. He looked kind of regal as he strutted through the forbidden door.
My husband and my favorite sign was one at the pediatrician that said “This is not a trash can!” Stuck on what was clearly a trash can. I think they meant don’t put your kid’s dirty diapers in here, but we used to say that all the time when throwing something out in a public trash can. It was the exclamation point for me. Like, in case you don’t believe us, we’re going to add this exclamation point.
When I see a strip "in the wild" (like on Instagram), I don't read the signs. I save them for when it appears on GoComics--like a sweet at the end of the meal. An extra jolt of funny!
back when i worked the box office at a movie theatre, we had the movies playing and their start times on signs posted above our heads but every single customer would ask the same thing, "what time is the next showing for such and such?" my favourite thing to do would be to point above my head and say, " i have visual aids!" it usually got a sheepish chuckle and we would both silently let their faux pas go because everyone knew they still would never read signs anyway.
i love that you know that old protest song, btw. it's good you lovely young people know the classics. 😎
I hope you're proud of me; I do take down signs and put them in the trash. Usually, they are not motivational signs, they are advertising things that have passed. I will take them off of a door that is not mine; I will usually hand the sign to whomever is on the other side of the door and ask them to throw it away. Often I am met with a fearful glance; these people are scared that their boss is going to be mad at them because I took down the sign. When I see that look, I quietly fold the sign and take it with me to recycle
Thanks Stephen for being on Substack and making my day. I read all the signs, and often, as you do, play with the words, question the placement, and the appropriateness, in quiet amazement.
I remember my first cartoon sign, courtesy of Charles Schultz : Lucy’s “Psychiatrist Open 5c” and her brother Linus looking askance and Charlie Brown being … Charlie Brown
I was 10 yrs old, and had no idea what a psychiatrist was or what they did. I had just flown to Japan, and on our first night there, my Dad gave me a Peanuts comic book, filled with his daily strips.
I remember feeling jet-lagged, and distinctly “not getting” that particular strip, and saving it in my head, defaulting to another time, when so many of the other strips in that book brought about wry grins.
Isn’t that crazy (amazing) how your Substack and strips evoked that specific memory from 55 years ago?
In my days as a museum guard, i noted that the larger the sign, the fewer people read it. i watched folks completely miss the signs describing an exhibit, and then crane their necks and squint to read some little manufacturer's tag in the corner of the side of a display case...
That is an excellent observation. You’re absolutely right.
The funniest sign to me is “Authorized Personnel Only” or some variation on a door. Every door is for authorized personnel; the question is just, who is authorized? The door to McDonald’s is for authorized people only, and they’ve authorized everyone.
This is spooky. I just made a comic about Authorized Personnel. My motivation was a doctor who casually walked through a door that was painted “Authorized Personnel” in the biggest lettering I’ve ever seen. He looked kind of regal as he strutted through the forbidden door.
My husband and my favorite sign was one at the pediatrician that said “This is not a trash can!” Stuck on what was clearly a trash can. I think they meant don’t put your kid’s dirty diapers in here, but we used to say that all the time when throwing something out in a public trash can. It was the exclamation point for me. Like, in case you don’t believe us, we’re going to add this exclamation point.
Excellent! Was the sign painted by Magritte?
The exclamation point suggests that it was in denial about its identity.
Hah I think it was a frustrated nurse.
Or, it could have been a recycling can. Horses, zebras.
When I see a strip "in the wild" (like on Instagram), I don't read the signs. I save them for when it appears on GoComics--like a sweet at the end of the meal. An extra jolt of funny!
Signs
Signs
everywhere the signs, blockin' out the scenery
breakin' my mind
do this - don't do that
can't you read the SIGN????
with credit to the 5 man electrical band . . . of course . . .
back when i worked the box office at a movie theatre, we had the movies playing and their start times on signs posted above our heads but every single customer would ask the same thing, "what time is the next showing for such and such?" my favourite thing to do would be to point above my head and say, " i have visual aids!" it usually got a sheepish chuckle and we would both silently let their faux pas go because everyone knew they still would never read signs anyway.
i love that you know that old protest song, btw. it's good you lovely young people know the classics. 😎
Asking a question while standing by a sign that’s answering the question has always been my favorite customer interaction.
Signs? Who has time for si - ah, crap, missed my exit...
You're the one who draws these comics!?!?!?
I first saw them on a different website, I love them! I can't believe it!
I am heeeere! My comics are smeared across the internet, but GoComics is the home site.
This is where I come to be a little more silly.
Awesome! Most signs exceed their lifespan due to fear.
Great comment.
I might use it as a sign !
Thanks for a lovely read.
I hope you're proud of me; I do take down signs and put them in the trash. Usually, they are not motivational signs, they are advertising things that have passed. I will take them off of a door that is not mine; I will usually hand the sign to whomever is on the other side of the door and ask them to throw it away. Often I am met with a fearful glance; these people are scared that their boss is going to be mad at them because I took down the sign. When I see that look, I quietly fold the sign and take it with me to recycle
Awesome! Most signs exceed their lifespan due to fear.
You are very funny and talented. First good laughs in a while. Thanks. No Trespassing.
Very appreciated. Thank you.
Thanks Stephen for being on Substack and making my day. I read all the signs, and often, as you do, play with the words, question the placement, and the appropriateness, in quiet amazement.
I remember my first cartoon sign, courtesy of Charles Schultz : Lucy’s “Psychiatrist Open 5c” and her brother Linus looking askance and Charlie Brown being … Charlie Brown
I was 10 yrs old, and had no idea what a psychiatrist was or what they did. I had just flown to Japan, and on our first night there, my Dad gave me a Peanuts comic book, filled with his daily strips.
I remember feeling jet-lagged, and distinctly “not getting” that particular strip, and saving it in my head, defaulting to another time, when so many of the other strips in that book brought about wry grins.
Isn’t that crazy (amazing) how your Substack and strips evoked that specific memory from 55 years ago?
I’m honored! Peanuts strips taught me a lot. Comic strip paperbacks were my security blanket when I was ten.
American corporate slavery
I go to Japan often. One facility had a “staff only” in English but not in Japanese. Most people here don’t understand English. ???
Is the brown haired girl supposed to be a child?
Tabby is just short, initially inspired by a short coworker.